Monday, 7 June 2010

Some gems from my beloved employer

My employer takes security pretty seriously. We deal with a lot of confidential and/or priveleged information. All staff are vetted by the NIA prior to getting a job (well actually it starts after you are offered the job. Unlucky for you if you get booted 2 months in.). And you know, our offices must be secure and stuff. So we have a security team, one of which claims to be an ex-NIA agent. Sure.

Anyway they very infrequently send around completely random bits of 'advice', which are always entertaining. Part of today's 'Security Awareness Flash' are no different. It concerns the World Cup and appears to have been written by ADT. Don't touch me on my studio, people.

"For those of you who are going to the games, the trouble you are likely to come across will be either a few drunken yobs looking for a fight or pickpockets."

Yeah drunken yobs I'll help you look for those pickpockets! 

"The World Cup will attract international pickpockets from around the world."


"The SA authorities estimate that approx 300,000 Africans will come over the borders for the tournament. The borders will not be able to cope with the surge and checks will be cursory in most cases. Babies will be abducted for scrupulous adoption agencies in Nigeria and the like."

I'm not paraphrasing there - the third sentence was acutally put after the second sentence. And shame poor Nigeria. Even their scrupulous adoption agencies apparently steal babies from the other end of the continent.


Greg said...

Thats pretty funny, but the stuff about pickpockets is probably correct. Teams of Romanian pickpockets are often picked up at Sydney airport on their way into or out of the country. Australia is obviously a softer target than SA, but there will be lots of Australians in SA for the world cup...

Dr Phil said...

Why Romanian and not Bulgarian I wonder? Sounds like a bit of stretch to me. I mean how many pockets do you have to pick (getting mostly Zuid Afrikan Rands) to pay for a return flight to Jozi and accommodation?

Greg said...

Maybe Bulgarian too, i dunno. The pikeys are everywhere. They dont just steal ronts, they steal watches and phones too. Apparently they go wherever there are lots of tourists, and police with better things to do.